What happened to "You're welcome!" as a response to "Thank You"? It's not even included in the canned answers on an apple watch. Have we as a society abandoned it?
Personally, I like to make an assessment of my feelings toward the favor done. If I feel put upon, I give an "mhmm" or "yup". My enthusiastic response is usually "no problem!"
"You're welcome" implies you can ask for favors anytime, day or night, and feels a bit too prostrate. I'll say it to some people, but it almost feels like an "I love you" type of response, and I reserve it for when I really mean it. I don't say the words "you're welcome" casually. I kind of say them like you would say something deeply truthful to someone
While we're at it, what's up with young people saying "bless you"? I kinda thought that one would have fallen off with people under 35
I feel the opposite actually. I say "no worries/problem" when I'm trying to communicate that the task was not a burden and that the person isn't bothering me if they ask again. I say "you're welcome" to acknowledge that I went out of my way to put effort in for them and that I appreciate their appreciation.
It's definitely more personal, like if I said thanks for a gift and they said no worries, it would feel a little transactional (for me).
If someone thanks me for my open source code, I'm going to say "you're welcome" because I've put many hours in primarily to improve their experience. If one of the more senior devs in my community asks me clarify something in my documentation and says thanks I'm going to say no worries because I would've done that anyway if I was aware of the issue. Honestly in that case I'm going to thank the dev for pointing me to the issue.
Yes it does actually imply that: you incurred no loss of status, nor debt, for this thing.
It’s for situations where the “favor” could be provided a thousand times without issue.
It’s for situations you totally don’t mind repeating, such as when you’ve provided a cup of coffee for a customer.
“No problem” is more appropriate for situations where it actually would be an imposition to repeat that favor. Like, your neighbor wakes you up in the middle of the night asking to use your hose to put out a little fire in his back yard.
“I’m so sorry to wake you. That was dumb of me. I should get my own hose …”
It's too bad Apple don't think all the thoughts I want to think for me anymore. Oh well. 8GB of RAM is all I need, and I have removed "You're welcome" from my lexicon.
In the southeast of Ireland I've heard it 'bodder', almost like the Danish soft d instead of the th, but it was just a couple of guys so maybe the sample size is a bit off.
Fifteen years ago when I was traveling around California and Nevada, I was weirded out at how sales people responded to "thank you". They either said "yup", "ok", or stayed silent. I assumed it was a regional thing.
Disclaimer: These are just my dumb thoughts with zero scientific evidence. Consider the opinion accordingly.
I think it's tied to how overwhelmed everyone is at all times now. Part of it is often "thanks" is said while someone is beelining out the door, so you don't often have an opportunity to even say "you're welcome." Further, "no problem" is far more indicative of "actually, you didn't inconvenience me at all by getting my help" in a society where everyone is absolutely time-starved due to overwork/underpay. It's saying to the person saying "thank you" that "it's okay to have minorly inconvenienced me, it was worth doing anyway."
Because yes, I am more likely to say "no problem" at this point than "you're welcome" because most of the time I am dispensing technical information and advice that people usually have to pay to get. That's the other aspect of it too, we've normalized that you have to pay to get anything decent (service or product) and so people offering technical skills and advice outside of a payment plan is definitely viewed differently.
"You're welcome" is valid but just doesn't play well in a fast-paced society where everyone expects to have to pay through the nose for decent help and generally doesn't have the time to give out those kind of favors themselves.
in a society where everyone is absolutely time-starved due to overwork/underpay
“You’re welcome” can almost appear condescending or stuck up in those situations whereas “No problem” comes across as an attempt to be a little more genuine
Years ago, I had to do customer service training for a job, and one thing they said is to always say "you're welcome" instead of "no problem", because some people think "no problem" is rude. But I think it's a generational thing, and it's kind of the opposite with younger folks.
Implying that it was an effort, but you are welcome to it. Whereas “no problem” denotes that the effort is was not a problem for me to do. I use them interchangeably - “you’re welcome” as a response to a complement, or something where there was moderate effort put into the task; “no problem” when the task was low effort (“Thanks for responding to that email so quickly”) or I feel my effort was obliged (helping pick up after a meeting).
Disagree, no problem is saying that what you are thanking me for was not a problem for me to do.
Honestly, I think this perception is the disconnect between millennials thinking it’s better and boomers thinking it’s rude - two different perspectives of what it means.
Maybe it's "you are welcome (to ask me for help/favors, as I am neutral to the task. I might even enjoy it.)"
And "it's not a problem (for me to do what you asked me to do; we have now both acknowledged that I have done something to help you that was not organic to me, but now we can move past it with no further conversation.)"
I bet "no problem" to some people is like seeing someone wear a T-shirt to church. They'd really prefer it if you would put on a suit and tie, even though the purpose of both are the same (cover my body when away from home because that is our current social agreement), because a T-shirt is disrespectful.
Also everyone sucks, it is a problem, and you are not welcome.
I had to do one communucation trainung where the trainer saud that saying "no problem" should not be used, because it implies there might've been a problem. I was not convinced though.
Wow. facepalm The words literally say there's no problem, and yet it somehow implies there is a problem? Talk about overthinking what someone is saying.
This is why I often hate neurotypical communication styles. The world would be a lot more straightforward if people just said what they meant. Jesus fucking Christ on a motorbike...
... would be quite a sight to see. Although if He can do all those other miracles, I guess fucking Himself on a motorcycle wouldn't be impossible. So I guess it's just a straightforward statement on your part.
Someone said that to me just the other day! That saying "no problem" implies there might be a problem. Crazy. I'm thinking of switching to "well it was quite an imposition on my time and energy to help you out, especially given you're not paying me, but I'll let it slide this time because you seem like an ok person and I'm in a good mood" just to annoy them.
When a chic-fil-a worker hits you with that, you gotta one-up them with "No! The pleasure is all mine!" and then hit the gas, peeling out cackling because you stole that pleasure motherfuckaaaaah.
I told a bartender “oh, the pleasure was all ours!” one time just sort of joking around and he said “you have no idea how much”. I wasn’t really sure how to take that.
he hated us in particular (there'd be no reason why though, my gf and I showed up, had a couple glasses of wine, didn't complain that one had gnats in it, got rained on on the patio, went inside and paid and I had just finished tipping 25-30%)
I think a lot of younger generation, myself included, prefer casual responses, conflating professionalism with being rude, slimy, or otherwise malintentioned
For paid service I like the simple "of course" recognizing that is what I'm here for and it's normal. No faux generosity nor implication of a tolerated imposition.
During my years in retail exactly one customer ever had a problem with me saying "no problem". He also said he was an assassin. That's not a joke. This old, fat boomer said I shouldn't say 'no problem' because some people might take it to mean 'yes problem' and then told me he kills people for a living.
That's the stability of people that can't understand the meaning of words. If I go to a police station and say I am a serial killer vs I'm not a serial killer, I don't expect them to react the same...
What happened to "You're welcome!" as a response to "Thank You"? It's not even included the one canned answers on an apple watch. Have we as a society abandoned it?
I hear “No problem” far more often.
I've used both equally. "Thank you!" when I'm more appreciative about what was gifted/helped, and "No problem" when I just wish to be courteous and acknowledge, or I'm indifferent to, the aid that was given me.